A Day In A Dog’s Life During The Pandemic
Dear Diary,
My human has been home for the last four weeks. In other words, this has been the best month of my life! We sit on the couch together and watch TV, we play fetch in the backyard, we go on walks about sixteen times a day. I’ve never been so happy!
If that wasn’t great enough, the groomers are closed! My fur is getting thick and hanging down my face but I don’t care. I think I look like a teen idol from the 1980s. Besides, growing my hair out sure beats going to get it cut. Those clippers are sharp….and don’t even get me started on what those people in the smocks do to my anal glands!
My human has been watching the news a lot and worrying about toilet paper. I’m not sure why they’re so concerned about that! Don’t they know they can just drag their butt on the back lawn like I do? The carpet in the living room works too.
All the walks we’ve been going on have given me a chance to patrol the grounds more than ever. I have to say that our mailman is pretty shady. I wonder what’s in his bag. Maybe it’s just mail or maybe it’s a weapon of some sort. I always bark and growl at him to warn my human of the dangers. I also protect my humans from squirrels – those things could have rabies!
My human has been getting a lot of packages each day from someplace called Amazon. Every time the delivery person rings the doorbell, I must get up and bark. My human tells me to hush but I’m just doing my job. Don’t they know it’s for their own good?
At night, we started watching a show called Tiger King. It’s okay if you’re into cats. Maybe something called Wolf King will come out. I think I’d dig that more.
